Adamantium Bullet: Reel World Rants, Rumors, And Reviews
23May/11

Adamantium Men #32: Jason Statham

JASON STATHAM

Jason is one hot actor, reminds me of a real life James Bond: Amazing in action scenes, looks good while delivering them and I love to hear him talk. There is something regal, not to mention sexy, about his voice. Jason is absolutely irresistible behind the wheel of a car and he can be my driver anytime. I think that he got that hot bod from diving, I just read in his bio that he finished twelfth with the British National Diving Team in the World Championships in 1992. I guess a pro diver to action hero is ok. Worked for Arnold Schwarzenegger who was a body builder when he started acting.

CAREER HIGHLIGHTS

The TRANSPORTER Series - Statham as Frank Martin, the Driver, is like the new 007: one car, one driver and always sporting a clean suit. While I loved first movie, the third seemed more like it should have been the second and vice versa. All three are amazing but work better if watched one, three and finally two. Should be interesting to see where the new Cinemax series (the one that features another actor assuming the Frank Martin role) ranks. Probably won't be too high since Statham isn't reprising the role.

DEATH RACE - Once again, Jason is behind the wheel. This time, he's put in an illegal prison race war by being falsely imprisoned by the producer/warden (Joan Allen) of a top-rated prison show called DEATH RACE. I guess everyone (real world and reel world) knows he belongs in a car.

CRANK - Finally, a movie without him in a car. However, in CRANK, he is the car. Instead of behind-the-wheel, Statham uses himself as an instrument of destruction and does so with a flair hardly seem in movies. This is one wall-to-wall action-filled crazy movie.

THE ONE - Sci-fi craziness with Statham as a dimension-hopping cop who's on the trail of Jet Li who's set out to murder each and every one of his alternate-dimension alter-egos in an effort to gain their power and become THE ONE! Okay, doesn't make much sense, but this is one kick-ass movie. Pair it with WAR to double up on the Statham/Li goodness.

THE ITALIAN JOB - Love this movie. Will say though that it mostly made me (along with most people) want to buy a Mini-Cooper. Cut out all the heist stuff, the double and triple crosses and excellent chemistry between the crew (which includes Statham, Charlize Theron, Mark Wahlberg, Seth Green, Mos Def, Donald Sutherland and Edward Norton) and you're left with an extended car commercial. Doesn't take away from the fact that this movie rocks, but you mind need to know that you'll probably drop twenty grand on a new car after seeing THE ITALIAN JOB.

THE EXPENDABLES - A group of mercs set out to overthrow a dictator and a group of aging action heroes (Sylvester Stallone, Bruce Willis, Dolph Lundgren, Jet Li, Mickey Rourke, Statham and Arnold Schwarzenegger) attempt to remain relevant with modern audiences. Not a bad movie, not a great movie, THE EXPENDABLES is mostly just a good old-fashioned action movie. Know that and you'll do fine here.

YOU MIGHT HAVE MISSED HIM IN

CELLULAR - Statham goes outside the box by playing the bad guy in this thriller. He does a pretty good job here, but the film is mostly remembered as a Chris Evans vehicle and has largely been forgotten.

13 - Not sure what exactly this is. IMDB says that it's an action movie starring Statham, Mickey Rourke and 50 Cent that came out last year sometime but I certainly don't remember ever seeing it. J doesn't remember it either, so I guess this one is still sitting on the shelf or it came out and nobody noticed. Either way, I definitely missed Statham in 13 and I'm pretty sure you did too.

CAREER LOWLIGHTS

IN THE NAME OF THE KING: A DUNGEON SIEGE TALE - Not sure why acclaimed hack Uwe Boll felt the need to cast Statham as a fallen knight who battles an evil wizard played by Ray Liotta but he did it. The results were...um, yeah, awful. Just awful.

REVOLVER - The best way to know you are in the presence of a bad Jason Statham movie is to see whether or not he has a full head of hair or if he is clean shaven (moderate fuzz is okay). Shaven usually means that it's an okay pic while full head of hair means that you are in store for a crapfest. Amongst his hairy crapfests are LONDON, GHOSTS OF MARS and REVOLVER. The first two have their moments and aren't actually all that bad, but there is no excuse for REVOLVER. Just an all-around bad movie that tainted all of the talent involved.

GNOMEO & JULIET - I just feel that voice work is a waste of this Statham's talent. I only hope he only did this for some child in his life. If that's the case, then I guess this is okay. After all, guy has to appeal to the kiddies who can't watch his R-rated action epics. However, if this isn't the case, then there is no reason he should've done this movie. Nobody wants to see Statham as a lawn gnome. Nobody.

COMING ATTRACTIONS

THE KILLER ELITE - I think Statham wants to channel his inner Chuck Norris for this movie. A special agent of some kind, who you know is the best, comes out of retirement to find who is murdering his comrades. Late 2011.

SAFE - Statham sets out to save a girl abducted by the Triads. Expect copious amounts of ass-kicking. Set to be released in 2011.

BLITZ - Out-of-control cop VS out-of-control serial killer. Doesn't take a genius to get where this is going, but with Statham in the lead, I'm sure the journey will be well worth it. This flick is supposedly going to open late 2011.

Posted by AngieBee

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