Michael Fassbender To Headline And Co-Produce ASSASSIN’S CREED

Variety is reporting Michael Fassbender is set to headline and co-produce a big screen adaptation of the popular videogame ASSASSIN’S CREED. Hmm. Didn’t see that coming.

Michael Fassbender will star in and co-produce "Assassin's Creed," the bigscreen adaptation of Ubisoft's videogame franchise, through his DMC Film banner.

While Fassbender's profile has risen with roles in "X-Men: First Class," "Shame," "Haywire," "Prometheus," and will next be seen in "The Counselor" and "Twelve Years a Slave," thesp also has spent the past year developing films with Conor McCaughan through their new shingle. Together, they produced the short "Pitch Black Heist."

"Assassin's Creed" is the duo's most high-profile project, given that the game is Ubisoft's biggest franchise, selling over 30 million units since 2007. A third "Assassin's Creed" game bows Oct. 30 and is set during the American Revolution. First two take place during the Crusades and Renaissance. Altogether there have been a total of nine games released across various platforms.

Plot revolves around a man who learns his ancestors were trained assassins after he is kidnapped by a secret org with ties to the Knights Templar, and sent back in time to retrieve historical artifacts.

Listen, I dig Fassbender. He’s easily one of my favorite actors working today. I see him in a movie and his presence is an almost immediate indicator that there’s some good-looking interestingness about to go down.

But ASSASSIN’S CREED? I don’t see it. Isn’t Altaïr ibn La'Ahad Palestinian? Not to go straight the color issue but Altaïr has a dark complexion. Fassbender, on the other hand, is white as white can be and is Irish to boot. I’ve never seen him with a tan and can’t imagine he looks good with one. Please, for the love of all that right and pure, tell me this isn’t going to be another case of a white dude trying to pass off as Middle Eastern. Didn’t Ubisoft learn their lesson after they pulled that Jake Gyllenhaal bullsh*t in PRINCE OF PERSIA: THE SANDS OF TIME?

That having been said, I don’t think Fassbender is going to play Altaïr. Seriously. Anyone who’s played the AC games knows there’s a modern day wraparound centering on a character named Desmond Miles. I’d explain his full role in the game but it is way too sci-fi nutty to encapsulate into just a few sentences. Just know Desmond exists in modern time, is aided by a beautiful blonde named Lucy Stillman (who was voiced by and modeled on Kristen Bell who, logically, should reprise the role for the film), and ultimately ends up on the run from some big shadowy organization before saving the world and then falling into a trippy coma and …a lot of stuff happened over the course of five games and it’s all very confusing. Didn’t I just say I was NOT going to try and encapsulate the series into a few sentences? Why did I try?!?

But that’s who I think The Bender is going to play. My guess is they’ll go halfsies with the present/past storylines and that way they’ll have their big star in a role more suited to his talents and they can hire either a familiar face or a relative newcomer to play Altaïr.

Do that and this flick might actually work. Give Fassbender a spray tan and a mildly offensive accent and …aw, who am I kidding? I’ll watch anything this guy is in. If I can endure two seasons of HEX, the Joel Schumacher stinker BLOOD CREEK, and JONAH HEX to get a Fassy fix then I’ll certainly endure another possibly crappy videogame movie.

USELESS KNOWLEDGE: Michael Fassbender’s first feature film appearance was as Stelios in Zack Snyder’s 300.

[via Variety]