Adamantium Bullet

BIG BANG Babe Melissa Rauch Ditches Nerd For Naughty In New MAXIM Spread


I’m a big fan of THE BIG BANG THEORY. Big in the sense that I watch it all the time (it’s a good background noise kind of show) and not in that I’m big and a fan… though that both of those remarks are true and to be expected since I write mindless movie malarkey (old-timey slang for two points!) for a living. Whoa. Sorry about that. Been feeling pretty fat lately. Not sure what it is about trying to lose weight, but the minute you start doing it, you suddenly realize how big you’ve gotten, you start to feel every single pound of it, and holy f*cking hell have I derailed this first paragraph. MULLIGAN!

I’m a big BIG BANG THEORY fan and, being that I am one, I’ve got a hierarchy of who my favorite and least favorite main characters are. Sheldon (Jim Parsons), Penny (Kaley Cuoco), and Raj (Kunal Nayyar) are numbers #2, #3, and #4 respectively. Howard (Simon Helberg) and Amy (Mayim Bialik) are tied at #5. Leonard (Johnny Galecki) is slam at the bottom of the list at #6, likely never to go any higher due to his insufferable whininess. Yeah, Sheldon is whiny too, but he’s fun whiny. Leonard is just whiny.

At #1 is sweet Bernadette, played by C.O.O.L (Current Object Of Lust) cutie Melissa Rauch. Ask anyone who’s ever seen me watch BIG BANG and they’ll tell you I go into a freakin’ trance every single time this gal shows up. I could listen to that sexy little squeak-voice of hers all day. Hell, I like Bernadette so much that I just wish they just spin Howard and her off onto their own show and… okay, maybe not that much, but I dig both Bernadette and Rauch. Something about these two (Is it weird that I’m separating them or proper?) is just crazy appealing to me.

Which is why I practically cheered when I saw that Rauch landed a uber-naughty spread in the December issue of MAXIM. Sure, I’d have preferred Rauch stripping off her pink sweater and floral print dress while in character as Bernadette, but I ain’t gonna complain about some kinky S&M-themed action. Won’t complain one bit.

Check the pics out below… and please forgive the general skeeviness of this piece. It’s been a long week and I’m just calling like I sees it at this point.

melissa-rauch-maxim13-1 melissa-rauch-maxim13-2 melissa-rauch-maxim13-3 melissa-rauch-maxim13-4 melissa-rauch-maxim13-5 melissa-rauch-maxim13-6

Posted by J. Bryant

Filed under: C.O.O.L Comments Off
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