Adamantium Bullet

T.G.I.F. #47: MALLRATS (1995) (Theatrical Cut VS Extended Cut)

TOTALLY GRATUITOUS AND INAPPROPRIATE FRIDAY is a spoiler-laden NSFW podcast where J Bryant and AngieBee discuss movies/shows you probably shouldn’t watch with your spouse, significant other, teenage children, parents, small children, buddies, children in general, siblings, folks you barely know, or ones with heart conditions. You’ve been warned.

In this week's episode of Totally Gratuitous and Inappropriate Friday, J Bryant and AngieBee compare and contrast the two different cuts of writer/director Kevin Smith’s 1995 cult comedy MALLRATS starring Shannen Doherty, Jason Lee, Jeremy London, Claire Forlani, Stan Lee, Jason Mewes, Michael Rooker, and Ben Affleck.

When Brodie (Jason Lee) is dumped by his girlfriend Rene (Shannen Doherty), he retreats to the mall with his best friend T.S. (Jeremy London), whose girlfriend Brandi (Claire Forlani) has also left him. Between brooding and visits to the food court, the unmotivated twosome decide to win their girlfriends back with the help of the ultimate delinquents, Silent Bob (Kevin Smith) and Jay (Jason Mewes), whose continuing adventures take the word "nuisance" to a whole new level.

The Official Mallrats (Theatrical Cut) Drinking Game

Take a shot when…

…Rene changes outfits.

…Jason Lee and Ethan Suplee appear alongside each other, workshopping the crackerjack chemistry they’d later employ on MY NAME IS EARL.

…Jay says “Nooch” or “Noochies”.

Take a double shot when…

…A character references Shannon’s (Ben Affleck) sordid sexual practices. This includes when characters say the phrase “What? Like the back of a Volkswagen?

…Brodie breaks the fourth wall.

…Two characters wearing matching flannel shirts appear in the same scene.

Take a triple shot when…

…Silent Bob speaks.

…Michael Rooker’s ass makes an appearance.

…Brodie “stink palms” himself, random items, or another character. (Remember: Brodie never washes his hands on-camera. That means pretty much everything he touches from the point he explains the “stink palm” to the moment the end credits are over is victim.)

The Official Mallrats (Extended Cut) Drinking Game

Take a shot when…

…It’s revealed that Quint’s musket is actually loaded! Loaded with blanks, to be fair, but still loaded.

…The Governor (Elizabeth Ashley) complains about her security detail.

…A character directly name checks either SEGA or “The Bandit”.

Take a double shot when…

…Reporters randomly pop up and start asking questions.

…The “Quick Stop” from CLERKS makes a cameo appearance.

…Jay says “Knock it off!

Take a triple shot when…

…A character references to the “Cheese Haus”.

…Michael Rooker’s balls make an appearance.

…Rene drops the “R word” which we're pretty sure wasn’t okay even back in 1995.

Posted by AngieBee

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